all sensations leading down to the sensation of life down drain, extension of pain, after dedication of life spent in vein, I mean in vain…….

I had my own death planned out since I was, I don’t know 14. A clever escape from a life of running a race into nothing, a condolence for a life spent on nothing but purchasing pain… in vain, in vein.

I am heroic.

Heroine, heroine, where art there heroine?

I like to drop the e’s sometimes.

X is one hell of a drug.

Trigger. Trigger. Trigger.

This is fun.

TOXIC TOXIC
WORD VOMIT
ACID BILE
Okay, I am done.

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Need an outlet, I am spinning tales of death to distract myself from what I am really thinking. It is 9:24 on the east coast……. and I am sitting staring into the darkness of this screen, thinking of how much I long for something, out of sickness…. I long for you… oh spindle of silence,

Heroin, oh heroin, I love you so,

Heroin, oh heroin, why must I say no?

Why, must I long for you for the sweet kiss of death every night at this time?

Something set me off, and now I am insane, I am searching for a cause, but there is not one, not that I know of, because it was something small, that should not cause fear at all, but you sick my mind is thick with sickness, un-perceived by me, so I have to do this sometimes, write about

NOTHING, unpacking misery stuffed into a soul filled with everything and

NOTHING
I am you, I hate everything you do, you are stupid too, you do nothing right, you are a sick loser, in perpetually fight, hiding in dark night.

STOP IT **** it.

Please stop it? Please?

If I get on my knees, will you stop it?

I like it when you..

**** you.

**** you. **** you. **** you. I am not listening anymore. I am not listening to you, because you are not real. I am a human being with feelings that are real.

YOU ARE PATHETIC.

YOU are pathetic, you are not me, speak for yourself buddy, not mine.

I am done with you.

Good, I tricked you, it worked.

End. Meditation.

Better?

Kind of.

Meditations death of resentment.