I no longer know what the goal of the site is, I write horror fiction, and love letters to myself.

This site is a tool to facilitate the act of seeing clearly, written by hands that used to hurt myself.

Explanation: I am Damien, I speak to my split personality Amanda. I am two people in love with each other, and I am okay with that now.

I have paranoid schizophrenia, narcissistic personality disorder, bipolar II-manic/depressive- rapid cycling, depression, anxiety, hydrocepholus, narcissistic personality disorder suffering from alcoholism, drug addiction, alcoholic. with OCD and PTSD- was addicted to heroin, meth, crack, alcohol, cocaine, prescription pills.

I am drug addict/alcoholic/dual diagnosis/ex-homeless person.

Characters thus far



Damien de Soto

Rei Clearly


First person

Blog post style

Dark horror fiction

Through dark horror fiction I rake the muck of the lives of street addicts.

Or in plain English this is an epic poem/novel about addiction told about low bottom addicts in horror style.

Somebody just saved my *** again, and the power of the universe.

I have been thinking a lot about my resentful nature recently. That is why I have been revealing who I am on here slowly, instead of sticking with my original rage fueled fake persona. Something somebody said today at lunch really stuck with me. I am not going to get into the details of it on here, but they basically revealed to me through what they said that I have been killing myself with my own hands, by refusing to give up resentments I hold towards myself and others, and that it is literally the equivalent of me being more okay with choking myself out, instead of just simply telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

I felt today so far like the universe through the power of something higher than me has been trying to save my life, because of how close I came over the past couple of days to deciding to give up on myself and go back to getting drunk or high.

I am so relieved to know that does not have to be the way it goes, and I simply have to be willing to do what people tell me to do.

Thank you, everything above me.


2 responses to “Somebody just saved my *** again, and the power of the universe.”

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